Sunday, August 13, 2006

El Hazard and the Pea

Last night was the third straight night that I have been totally exhausted and once in bed unable to sleep! My bed is comfy enough.. I just can't seem to find a comfortable position to fall asleep in. As I tossed and turned last night I realized that it wasn't the position or bed that was bothering me. I must have stayed awake in bed till way past 1 am trying to pinpoint the source of my irritation. I know now how the princess felt in that story where the pea was placed under her bed! Only in my case the pea sprouted into a huge beanstalk..
Aside from the fact that the receptionist on morning shift at the club is a 'chalba' and a certain blogger whose blog I used to read frequently turned out to be the male equivalent of a 'chalba' (he will probably go to hell for saying such things...) the root of my irritation came down to two things:
  1. My Project
  2. That damn cat

Generally, I'm a fairly patient person when it comes to the waiting game - except for when it's exam results, the lastest ep of one of my favorite anime to download or like in the case of my project, seeing the finished result. It is truly troubling to go to sleep every night knowing that it's yet another night and I've not finished! Last night in particular I was going to bed without having even looked at said project for the day much less finished it. - Irritation source # 1.

As for that damn cat..actually maybe he's still a kitten - but damned all the same! The day before yesterday the a/c switch in my room broke (hopefully the guy will come to fix it today!) so I haven't been spending any time in there except to shower or retrieve random items. Yesterday while searching for one of those random items I noticed a smell..not smell as in the result of leaving sweaty tennis clothes unwashed for a couple of days or even socks if worn for a week without washing! No this smell was about a thousand fold worse. If I stood by my bookcase the smell was really vague and I thought maybe I had imagined it but everytime I got near my chair I'd have sudden flashbacks of when I was a kid and used to play the game "Hot Buttered Beans" (God! I know the game has another name but for the life of me I can't remember what that name is.. anywayz for those who don't know, it's a game where one person hides a small item -which is shown to the players before it is hidden- somewhere in a room and then calls out to the participants of the game "Hot Buttered Beans! Come get your supper!" and then they would come and search the room as the person who hid the item informs them as to how close they are to the hiding spot by telling them they are "cold", "lukewarm", "warm" or in case they are extremely close "hot" or "burning".) My room door became "cold", my bookcase was "lukewarm" and the chair was "warm". To the left of my chair is the direction of the room door, so to search in that direction would be getting cold. So I went to the right of the chair. As I got closer and closer to my desk, which is in the corner on the right of the chair, the smell became "warmer". By that time I was sure of it. That damn cat left a surprise somewhere...

I think it took all of 5 mins to find 'it' half covered by a pile of papers by the wall. Smell had increased 100,000 thousand fold. I'm not going to go into the details of it (aren't I such a kind a caring blogger to spare my readers such disturbing descriptions?) I'll only say it would have been better - not to say that I like either but in terms of what is being talked about here - had it been a simple 'turd' or 'leak'. I so didn't feel like cleaning that up but it wasn't like anyone else would so I had no choice but to hold me breath and get on with it. That was late afternoon. Later, that evening, I went to put something away in there and thought I smelt something again. I had desperately hoped my nose was imagining things but in the back of my mind I knew the cat had left a token of his appreciation again. I was already exhausted but no way could I leave such a thing to permeate my room even if I wasn't planning to sleep in there last night! I searched around again and found not one surprise but TWO! That was way more than my tolerance meter could stand. A simple cleaning of the contaminated areas was so not going to do. The whole room was cleaned and disinfected with heavy duty chemicals till I was pouring off more sweat than I do when I play tennis (duh the a/c isn't working so it was bloody hot in there) and it screamed "For God's sake I'm CLEAN already, what more do u want?!". In the end of my madness I opened the windows and retired to the shower before finally crawling into bed. I was seriously considering kicking that runny @$$ed cat out on the street. If he were a cat and not a kitten I probably would have done it without hesitation. I wondered why the hell I took that cat in, in the first place. He's certainly not my beloved siamese cat Master Bu6i.. nor is he Jaasim for that matter. Deep down I must have believed he'd fill the void. No such luck. As punishment I locked him outside - not all the way out, he was still within the gate walls, just out of the house. There's plenty of sand out there he could use the bathroom in. Twice last night some one let him in and he came to sleep beside me. I was mad so he was put directly outside again.

Just guess what I found when I went into my "spotless" room this morning?! A fresh 'surprise' right under the window! DAMN - THAT - CAT!!!!!! After all of my cleaning and disinfecting and after banishing him outside in all that sand I wake up to find another 'surprise'????! That can only mean that he held himself and waited till he got back in the house to leave that damn mess in my room... I won't stand for it anymore! Cute or not, cat or kitten that demon is going out - not out the house, OUT THE GATE!

1 comment:

Dragon said...

Hazard, sweetheart! As a (former) fellow cat owner I can tell you that all you need have done was hold the beast's nose to the mess, find the nearest shipship and beat the living hell out of that cat till he squirmed and ran away. At that point you hunt up his tail again and repeat process. 3-4 repeats of this process would have cured him and spared your room!